We didn't have any fancy PlayStation or Xbox video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'Asteroids'. Your screen guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!!! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen... Forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE! PONG! that was it I had fucking PONG! The ball just went back and forth across the screen.
You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel!!! NO REMOTES!!! Oh, no, what's the world coming to?!?! Channel surfing was how fast you could spin the dial and then your parents would scream when the TV man had to come because you broke it from spinning it too fast.
There was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear what I'm saying? We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-finks! And if you woke your parents you were grounded for life! I think I'm still ground but mom is too old to remember.
And we didn't have microwaves. If we wanted to heat something up, we had to use the stove! Imagine that! You had a stove? we had a coal pot.
And our parents told us to stay outside and play... all day long. Oh, no, no electronics to soothe and comfort. And if you came back inside... you were doing chores! and they didn’t care how freakin cold it was outside. Put on a sweater the sun is out. So what its below zero your young when I was your age we wore T-shirts and played in the snow and loved it.
And car seats - oh, please! Mom threw you in the back seat and you hung on. If you were luckily, you got the "safety arm" across the chest at the last moment if she had to stop suddenly, and if your head hit the dashboard, well that was your fault for calling "shot gun" in the first place! Which explains why many of us look the way we do.
See! That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled rotten! You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980 or any time before! 1980? Shit they would have died from polyester in the 70's., or been drafted to Viet Nam in the 60's.
We didn’t have digital cameras, we had to take the film in and wait a week then pray the pictures came out good. We went to the movies early in the day so we could get the discount price and sneak from theater to theater because nobody had enough money to get into the movies more than once in a few months.
We didn’t have any good pornography. There was Hugh Heffner and maybe if the guy at Teamo wasn’t looking you could sneak a peak. then came Larry Flynt but someone shot him. We had to put up with a nipple shot of Farrah's Faucets, and they were that great. Some folks made a big deal about Marsha Brady when she wore a low cut blouse and showed cleavage, but nobody knew she was sleeping with everyone in the cast. And Florence Henderson was doing the boys.
Richard Nixon was not a crook, he was the president. Somehow Jimmy Carter go to be president, then it was Ronny Ray gun.
We had to duck and cover incase of an atom bomb. Like it would really save us. There are still supplies incase of an attack in the basement of my old public school which now has some dead persons name on it.
Public nudity was called streaking. The Frisbee was an actual toy. By the way the guy who invented the Frisbee died this year. Mini skirts was like mini sex, and what ever happened to hot pants.
Today girls have something called a muffin top which is pretty gross.
When I was young I was considered a big boy, by today's kids I'm in great shape as they all suffer from McDonalds.
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